Writersflock

Just Genius: The Anti-Theft Lunch Bag

Posted in Food, Musings by mcarmen5 on 11/19/2009

Hell hath no fury like a sister with stolen penis cookie.

We used to get plenty of PMS-inspired blasts on our sorority email list: misplaced hair dryers, missing heels, unreturned dresses and the ultimate crime, stolen food, all warranted a hissy fit.

But one particular email stands as a winner. A sister had just turned 20 and celebrated the beginning of her second decade with a festive phallic treat from a bakery in the Castro.  An angry KANYE-CAPS email was fired through the house network when she awoke the next morning to find pretty much just the left testicle in the fridge.

Since I normally buy boring groceries like kefir and fruit, I rarely come across this problem.

But for those of you who are tired, maybe even borderline bat-shit angry over yet another stolen sandwich or erotic baked good from the communal fridge, I present to you an ingenious solution: the anti-theft lunch bag!

Yes, they’re genius and they’re available here. Not only does it eliminate the need for angry red sharpie threats or flimsy post-its on your lunch, it’s practically fool-proof.  But your fridge-mates might just start to think you’re a bit gross…

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3 Responses

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  1. Zack Edwards said, on 11/19/2009 at 11:33 am

    I love it! It’s Hilarious!

  2. Tony L said, on 12/05/2009 at 12:58 am

    Foolproof to the extent that my co-workers aren’t cleaning out old moldy food from the fridge!!

  3. mlissm said, on 12/05/2009 at 1:06 am

    So true!


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